Bravery | Stepping into the Real Conversation with Yourself
I lay in bed at night and finally have some time for myself. The day is wrapped, checklist items complete and my head hits the pillow. This is when I have space to listen to the voices in my head. The same thoughts are playing over in my head, night over night, consuming me. I have come to realize that when you don’t meet your stories authentically they keep peeking back in. This time for me, it’s that tough conversation you need to have with someone but continue to find excuses and reasons to not follow through.
Lately I have found myself fighting that internal voice in my head, one that questions all your decisions, tells you can’t do something and reminds you that you aren’t good enough. Instead of fighting that voice, I have been listening to what it has to say. Knowing that voice is not going anywhere, I have started to get into the practice of leaning into it and using it as a guide to recognize and face my fears. What I have found is that I have become much braver around these tough conversations. Not caring what other people will think or say. Or not holding back in fear or hurting someone.
In my reflections I noticed some themes and wanted to share how to be braver in everyday life:
1. Courage is all about learning not to avoid fear
Courage is about fearlessness. The secret to courage is facing your fears. Instead of avoiding it, walk with it. You know that saying “do one thing a day that scares you” it's’ just that.
2. Practice makes Perfect
Courage is not innate, being brave is like any other skill, it is learned, and we must take the time to practice and master it. It is a habit that one should practice daily until it becomes the new norm. Like any muscle you exercise, start small and keep trying.
3. Fake it til you make it
That term “putting on a brave face” is true and it works. There have been so many times I was scared to walk into a room to present to executives. I’ve found that pretending to be braver than you feel is where courage and confidence begins.
4. Being brave is extremely personal
Be true to yourself. Two people can be in the exact same scenario and make a different decision, both being brave in their own way. Know what that is for you. Sometimes being brave is to show your vulnerability and asking for forgiveness.
5. Bravery is not about doing something
It can also mean saying no or having the courage to quit when something no longer serves you. Being that first person to stand up and speak out, it’s taking that leap by yourself when you have no one standing behind you.
6. Inhale & Exhale
It's funny how much we forget the simplest things, to me taking a few meaningful breaths before doing something I am afraid of. You will be amazed how just a few short breaths can recenter you and give you just enough time to take the plunge and try something new.
When you do take that leap of courage and do something brave, capture that feeling. Celebrate it, share it with others, or write it down to remind yourself how awesome you are. Now, are you willing to face your fears? What has been keeping you up at night and are you ready to take it on?
-Tas Goel, the Real Talk Guru & Mindful Mama